The Kid is missing, and no one knows where he could have gone to. Earlier that day, he’d been “really hilarious” at the expense of the infamous school bully, Casmire (?). According to Stacy, the guy didn’t take it so well, either. The rest of the kids perform their number without The Kid and then find themselves being watched by a strangely familiar incognito figure.

Apparently, Kid has broken a cardinal childhood rule – he ridiculed one of the three taboo topics: the U.S., mothers, and – you guessed it – Casmire. He figures he’s marked for death and is planning his getaway. Unfortunately for him, the only location he can make it to in time is the inside of a speaker.

Casmire struts in and is indeed out for blood. Even Mickey and Gloria are afraid of him. Stacy doesn’t seem to be old enough to have developed the self-preservation hormone, because she isn’t afraid. She’s only lucky that she’s not old enough to be a punching bag yet.

Casmire does some more posturing and then promises to return later that afternoon, to finish off Kid or any reasonable facsimile he can get his hands on if necessary. But Riley has an idea. He asks Stacy to help him put his plan into action.

Gloria, Mickey, and Renee try to convince Kid that he’s better off standing up to Casmire and apologizing than running away. There’s nothing they can say to him that works. He needs a hero.

As the fateful hour arrives, Casmire is circling the joint when he sees an extremely battered Riley limp up to The Place. He and Stacy spin a terrible tale about how Riley dared to criticize the great Taro Sushi Black-and-Blue belt champion…The Kid…and so Riley has paid the price. They pity his next victim.

Meanwhile, the older kids are still trying to psych up Kid and get him to face the music. He decides to bite the bullet and runs into a trembling Casmire. Each boy fears for his life and thanks to Riley’s suggestions, Casmire suddenly cowers.

The Kid, not knowing how he suddenly got the upper hand, chases him out of The Place – and then faints.

I gave this episode 3.5 microphones because unlike most family shows, the bully isn’t really a lonely, misunderstood scared kid who eventually comes around. He’s a bully, and he only backs down when he thinks he’s come up against a bigger bully. That’s reality for you – bittersweet endings are much more common than happy ones. On the other hand, the only reason The Kid came out on top is because Casmire was tricked. If you think the lesson was supposed to have been “stand up for yourself and you win”, it failed (See Karate Kids for a better representation of this lesson). But if you think the lesson was “stand up for your friends and you win”, then possibly the episode succeeded.