Lend Me Your Ears
Performing in public is never easy, although the kids of Kids Incorporated had a bit more experience than most of their friends. They all loved the spotlight, and enjoyed the attention they got on stage. But singing is only one type of performance.
When they put down their microphones, Kids Inc. became regular kids, and regular kids would do anything to avoid doing their homework after school. The kids joined their friends for some malts and video games.
Gloria, however, slipped off by herself. She stood in front of the vanity mirror in the storeroom, brushed her hair away from her face, and smiled widely.
"Good morning, everybody!" she said in a very forced tone. "No, that won't work! What if it's afternoon?" She stood up straight and tucked in her stomach. "Good after – ugh! How am I supposed to breathe? Ahem! Bonjour, tout le monde...nah." She sighed. "I'll just stick to English...Hello!"
"Hello." said The Kid from behind her.
Gloria whirled around to find the rest of Kids Inc. coming into the storeroom and looking at her quizzically. "W-what are you doing?" she sputtered.
"We...could ask you the same question." replied Ryan.
"Don't be silly, Ryan." said Stacy. "She's obviously saying hello to herself." Everyone laughed.
"Why are you talking to your reflection?" asked Renee.
Gloria sat down in a chair. "The school's French Club is having this big regional meeting with all the clubs in this area, and they want me to represent our chapter."
"That's great!" said everyone.
"But they want me to give a speech." continued Gloria.
"So what's the problem?" asked Kid.
"I don't know! Every time I start practicing, I just freeze up."
"But Gloria," said Ryan, "you're used to performing in front of a crowd. This should be easy for you."
"I thought so, too." said Gloria.
It bothered Gloria that a speech should choke her up when singing came so easily to her. When she went back on stage with the rest of the kids, her anxiety was gone.
"Maybe I should practice my speech with a microphone." she thought out loud.
"What's your speech about?" asked Ryan.
"Establishing international trust through young people."
"Sounds boring." Kid scoffed.
Renee nudged him. "I'm sure your speech is interesting, Gloria." she said.
Gloria looked away. "Well...it will be."
"What, you haven't written it yet?" said Ryan.
"I'm working on it."
"When are you supposed to give it?" asked Stacy.
"Next Tuesday."
Four jaws hit the floor.
"Maybe there's still time for you to resign." said Ryan.
Gloria sighed. "Qu'est-ce que je peux faire?"
Gloria stayed behind to see her French professor the next afternoon. He was so excited about one of his students speaking that he spoke too fast for her to completely translate. Mostly, he congratulated her and gave his assurance that she would be brilliant. He didn't realize he was doing more harm than good.
The next place Gloria headed was the library, figuring she might be able to find a book on public speaking. It was checked out - but she had a sneaking suspicion she knew who had it.
"They say that speaking in public is the third biggest fear among adults." said Ryan from behind the book. "Pretty intimidating, if you think about it."
"We don't want Gloria to think about it!" Renee told him. "What does it say to do?"
"I'm getting there!" insisted Ryan.
"Can you get there any faster?" said Gloria as she entered the storeroom. "I'm desperate!"
"What did your teacher say?" Stacy asked her.
Gloria replied in French - at lightning speed.
"Is that good?" said Stacy.
"Have you tried imagining everyone in their underwear?" said Ryan.
"EW!" the younger kids exclaimed, collapsing into giggles.
"Ryan! My professor's going to be there!" said a very red-faced Gloria.
"Okay, okay! Um...you should start with a joke. It'll loosen everyone up." Ryan said instead.
"A joke, huh?" said Gloria.
"Try not to look at just one person." Ryan continued. "Instead, look slightly above the crowd."
"Huh?"
"Let me show you." said Ryan. He put the book down and stood in front of Kid and the girls. "Say I'm giving a speech." he began. "I'm too nervous to look at one person, so if I just stare at that poster," the kids were sitting directly in front of a guitarist poster pulled from a magazine, "it will look as if I'm looking at them." The rest of the kids murmured their approval.
Gloria took his place and attempted to look only at the poster.
"Let's hear some of your speech." Kid suggested.
Gloria took a deep breath. "Good afternoon." she said. "It's nice to see people here from all walks of life. Um...But today, we're talking about the young people."
"Wait." said Ryan. He picked up the book and flipped through the pages. "Try to refrain from using placeholders such as 'um', 'uh' and 'er'." he read. "These give the audience the impression that you don't know what you're talking about."
"That's because I don't know what I'm talking about." retorted Gloria. She began again. "Good afternoon." she said.
"Don't forget the joke." Stacy reminded her.
"I just flew in from class, and..."
"We can't hear you back here." said Renee.
"I just flew in from class," Gloria repeated a little louder, "and boy, are my arms tired!"
No one laughed.
"That's your joke?" said Kid.
"It's a lot funnier in French." replied Gloria meekly.
"Okay, forget the joke." suggested Ryan. “Oh, and it’s not really necessary to begin by saying, ‘Today I’m going to talk to you about’. Especially in your case – everyone already knows what your topic is.”
“Ryan,” Gloria said angrily, “you’ve just eliminated my entire speech!” She left the room in a huff.
The Kids stared after her. “Poor Gloria. She must be so nervous about getting up in front of all those people.” said Renee.
“I can’t say I envy her.” Ryan added. “But there must be some reason they picked her. She can do this.”
Ryan may have been the only one who thought so. Gloria slept fitfully that night, tossing and turning. She couldn't get the tidbits from that library book out of her mind.
She was on stage at The P*lace, but she was by herself. The curtains opened to reveal a house full of people in berets. No one was applauding. Unsure of what she was supposed to be doing, she walked up to the lone microphone staring at her from its stand.
As Gloria opened her mouth to speak, the only sound she could make was "Ummm..."
The mic screeched back at her and she covered her ears. She happened to glance downward...and found that she was wearing nothing but her underwear!
"SPEECH!" boomed an unfamiliar voice.
"SPEECH! SPEECH! SPEECH!" echoed the rest of the audience.
"Um...uh...hello...um..." Gloria's voice cracked as sweat poured from her brow. "I'm here today to-to talk to you about..."
"BOOO!" the crowd bellowed.
"No, wait! Um...Pourquoi le poulet a-t-il traversé la route? Pour obtenir à l'autre côté!"
People leapt to their feet and began pelting Gloria with...fries?
"Oh, come on!" she complained as she narrowly avoided being hit by a stream of ketchup, "French fries aren't even French!"
Someone launched a croissant instead.
Ryan had sent the library book back, so Gloria checked it out herself. She was amazed to find that even politicians have had their share of speech anxiety.
She was also surprised to find teachers on the list. It seemed that she was in very good company.
The other Kids were waiting for her when she entered The P*lace. "Hey, Gloria. How's the speech coming?" asked Stacy.
"Badly." she answered. "I can't do this. What do I know about international relations?"
"More than you think!" said The Kid. "Remember Mbala? None of us could talk to him at first - except you."
"Because I spoke French." added Gloria. She was beginning to catch on.
"You got along great with Luanna, too." said Renee.
"Yeah, you've got lots of respect for other cultures," Ryan said, "because you've met a kid from each one."
"Well, everybody knows that kids get along better with each other than grownups do." said Gloria. "And French is the international language."
"There you go!" said Ryan.
Gloria picked up the textbook. "I'm going to write my speech." she said.
"YAY!" everyone cheered.
"But," Gloria added, "I'll need some peace and quiet." She began shooing the kids away. "Go on! Au revoir, A tout à l'heure, bye bye."
Kids Inc. began to relish giving Gloria some space over the next few days, because every time they did see her, she'd cajole them into being an audience for her speech.
Ryan noticed some fliers for the French Club's meeting as he walked into The P*lace. "Hey, have you guys seen Gloria?" he asked.
"No, thank goodness." The Kid griped.
"She keeps making us listen to her speech." said Renee.
"We've heard it four times now!" added Stacy.
"Five." Renee corrected.
Stacy glared at her sister before adding, "And it sounds exactly the same each time!"
"I've heard it a couple of times, myself." Ryan said to her. "She's just nervous. That meeting of hers is this afternoon."
Gloria sat in the school auditorium watching a skit being performed by some junior high students as she absently shuffled her note cards. It was hard to enjoy herself knowing that her speech was coming up, even with the buffet of delicious French pastries. So far, the conference had been pretty informative, and she was surprised to see how many students there were. It seemed as if every time she managed to push the speech to the back of her mind, someone would bring it up. Why did I have to go last?
The skit finally ended, and Gloria's professor took the stage to introduce her. Taking a deep breath, Gloria followed him.
It was odd that the stage was very reminiscent of The P*lace's. That helped considerably. She adjusted the microphone as the applause died down and cleared her throat.
Kids Inc. was on their fifth card game when Gloria floated into the storeroom. "Bonsoir, mes amis!" she said, beaming.
"Don't you look happy." said Renee.
"I take it your speech went well?" Ryan added.
"It went so well," Gloria replied, "that I don't have to take the final exam!"
"I want to give a speech!" said The Kid, and everyone laughed.
"You know, I was so worried about giving that speech, I didn't realize how perfect it was." Gloria said as she joined the rest of the kids at the table. "Kids don't care what language you speak or what color your skin is. Grownups should take a page from our book!"
"What book?" wondered Stacy.
Gloria laughed and hugged her. "My point is, we're all the same." she said. "We're all kids."
"I think you'd make a great ambassador." Ryan told her.
"The regional chair said the same thing." replied Gloria.
"I think," Riley had snuck in without any of them noticing, "you'd make a good band - if you could just proceed to le stage!"
They groaned.
The End
